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Monday, November 14, 2011

Small Town Girl with Big City Dreams

I have lived in Anniston/Oxford, AL for my entire life.  When I first came to Auburn I told everyone I was from Anniston because if I said Oxford everyone stared at me like I had three heads.  Small town USA is how I always referred to my hometown.

Everyone says to remember where you came from.  Know where your roots grow.  I love the adults in my hometown.  They helped me grow into the young lady I am becoming, they pushed me through hard times, and I never had to worry about my safety or well being when adults were around.  But when it came to high school aged people my worries were always high.  I was never secure after seventh grade.  I didn't believe in myself, I questioned everything, I wanted attention, but did not know how to make friends.  Is it bad that I don't necessarily want to remember where I came from?

I have dreamed, since the seventh grade, about moving to a big city and making all my dreams come true.  I have wanted to live in a high rise, with a dog, a great job, and a rocking life.  I always said I would never get married, have kids, or live in a big house.  Some of my dreams have changed but for the most part they still remain the same.  I still find myself, almost daily, dreaming about my future and what could be.

Auburn has been a great place for me to be these last four years.  It was just far away enough from all the pain I felt towards Oxford and it was just a tad bigger.  Although, Oxford is probably the same size as Auburn is now.  Anyways, these past four years have gone by fast but I think that is just another way of saying it's time for a new chapter.  Each day I feel myself getting closer and closer to the dreams I've always had for my life.  I cannot wait to see what the future holds for me.

I want to make a disclaimer on this blog because I don't want anyone to feel unappreciated.  I greatly appreciate all the adults who have shaped my life.  Without them, I would still be lost and Auburn would not have been as fabulous as it is/was.  Also, I want my family to know that I do not blame them for any of my hatred to Oxford.  I brought it upon myself.  You all just got the unsatisfactory job of dealing with my stubborn/difficult self.  I want to thank you for having patience with me.  I have become a better person because of the patience you all had with me.

In closing, I do not think there is anything wrong with moving on.  I will never forget where I came from but I will always be looking forward to the next big thing.  However, I am truly scared that I will not make it in this big city dream of mine.  Please pray that I continue to grow and learn so that I will be able to live the life I've always dreamed of having.

God Bless,

Kayla

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