Distance Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

For the last two weeks, I have had the people I love the most come and visit me in DC.  Two weeks ago, my Mom and sister came for five days and I was able to take a day off from work to spend extra time with them.  We had a blast and I was soo happy to see them.

Brenden came this past weekend for less than 48 hours.  We hadn't seen each other since mid-May so he was due for a visit.  While the weather was gloomy, we had the best weekend.  The best we had had in a long, long time.  Before we went our separate ways this summer it seemed fighting was the only way we could communicate.  I was dreading the distance.  I thought, if we can't communicate when we live two miles away from each other how the hell are we going to be able to communicate 1,200 miles apart?

The distance made us realize we had to work on our biggest problem, communication, or this was going to fail.  I would not wish long distance relationships on anyone.  However, after these last eight weeks, I would say it is worth a shot.  Before May, I was the most skeptical person when it came to long distance relationships actually working.  I've had plenty of people who have dealt with long distance to show me it can work but I never had enough faith in myself or someone else to actually make it work.

The key to making the distance work is communication.  That's all it is.  And of course a little give and a little take.  B and I were able to have longer conversations without fighting because the only connection we have had is talking to each other.  Before you leave each other, make sure you have a date set for the next time you are going to see each other.  It makes the 'good-bye' or 'see you later' a little easier.

My best friend, Holley and her husband Zack, and my parents were both excellent role models in making a long distance relationship work.  I have been so lucky to have them help me through this distance and provide me with tips on how to make it work.  It is possible.  Now with (hopefully) only ten months left in our year apart we will be able to stay together and be a stronger couple because we challenged our relationship.

If you have tips on how to make a long distance relationship work, please leave your tip below.  I would love to have some more insight to this.  It has only been two months into this long year for us so we still have many more hurdles to jump over.  If you have questions about making your long distance relationship work, I am no expert by any means, but I am willing to provide the  best insight I can. 

Communication

How important is communication? Is it possible to have zero communication with someone and still have a connection with them? I personally don't think so.  I don't know how to function without communication.  I think that is why I blog, Facebook, Twitter, text, email, call, etc.  I do not like to not be connected to people.  People make me happy and happy people make me happier! Making people happy makes me the happiest, but when communication falls short what do you do?

I am probably not the best communicator.  Maybe I should have majored in communications to learn how to communicate.  I wonder if I'm terrible at communication because I always have to be right or because I am so spoiled I only want things my way.  I don't know but those two characteristics are probably not good to have when making people happy is what makes me the happiest.  They seem to clash, don't you think?

How do you communicate exactly what you want? How do you express who you are through communication? Why does arguing seem to never solve anything? That's communication isn't it?  I'm so confused right now because communication keeps failing me.  You can't get things across the exact way that you want to via technology.  It will never happen.  Things are always misinterpreted and then it makes communication go sour.  Maybe that is why I'm such a terrible communicator because the only way I communicate is via technology.  Even so, I don't know how to express things differently to get my point across.  Even if technology fails me on almost all occasions I am a horrible....

It just hit me what may be my problem.  Listening.  I do not take the time to listen to people when they talk.  It is always about me talking and getting the most out of the conversation.  Why can I not be a selfless person? I'm so frustrated with myself right now and I know this blog is making no sense.  I treat this blog like a journal so this entry is one of those blogs I'm trying to figure out who I am.  I just hope that one day I can figure out how to be selfless, a good listener, and an even better communicator.  Pray for me as I seek help in these areas.  Maybe a nice run would help me get back on track.

Living and learning,

Kayla